Lost?! (A Nightmare...and A Course of Action)

Namastè!

Hello, darkness, my old friend... It's not quite 4 am here and I'm awake, as always. I think I actually sleep like a baby these days: I'm awake sporadically, sleeping 2 to 3 hour stretches, and waken ever so often to try to eat. Plus I seem to have my days and nights mixed up. My Circadians are so bad.

I had a pretty vivid bad dream during my most recent stretch of snee, but it spurned an idea.

Picture it: I'm in the mall with Kids Namastè, and Baby Namastè wanders off. I remember, in the dream, that I was looking at a blouse. Next thing I know, I look up and he's gone! I didn't see him anywhere. I panicked. When I was trying to describe him, I drew a blank when asked what he was wearing. My princess was crying. I was crying. The cop was telling me something about seconds counting and asking for a recent, clear photo--and for some reason I couldn't find one. (Word, add I take pics of the kids almost daily!)

I woke up terrified, cold arrest and all. Tears. Chest tight. It took a long moment for me to realize that not only was my baby safe and sound, but he was lying right in the crook of my arm. Right where he had slept since day one.

My scenario was a dream, thank goodness. Now that I've calmed down, I'm putting together a plan of action. Well, rehashing what I already know to do. Which I'll share with you.

Note: As with any tips or advice I offer here on the NamasBlog, please note that I am not a law enforcement officer. I am not an expert at preventing kidnappings or runaways (short of trying to provide the kind of life my kids don't want to escape)--take anything I say with a double shot of caution, shake liberally on the rocks of common sense, and dash generously on your particular situation. Your mileage may vary.

Now...my princess is ten, almost eleven now! I've been in the game for a while, and in the know even longer. I like to think of myself as an informed mama, especially on matters of safety.

So, walking through the scenario in my dream ( and let me reiterate that this was a dream--Kids Namastè are both safe in bed! I know because I almost woke them as I was settling back into reality!), I can see some mistakes I made. I'll walk you through how I should have prepared.

Note: I'm just examining what I recall from this dream. I was not being a negligent parent, nor was I intentionally inattentive. I was buying a shirt! Kids can wander off in a split second though. Despite being a dream, it was extremely vivid and very taxing. I'm an analyzer and planner, so I tend to take a proactive approach rather than reactive. Rehashing what I already know to be valid survival tips for outings.

I will skip the statistics sites for this one--you may find those on your own. Here we go...

Take a clear photo of each child, periodically.

No fussy background, no props, no Snapchat filters or photo editing. Have the child stand by a wall or your car (please obscure your tag) & get a head-to-toe photo. If you have multiple children, each child needs a separate photo. You may take a group pic, but the solo shots are more beneficial in an emergency. Update this photo AT LEAST every six months.

This is especially valuable before an outing--field trips, mall outings. Personally we make a point to take a pic before any outing involving any crowds or unfamiliar areas. (Don't forget--we often do New York. We also watch Law & Order...oy vey.)

Get a child ID kit!

Children would generally not have a state-issued ID, but parents can get an identification packet made for them. We use the child ID kit available here. It's a simple, straightforward process.

Make note of your child's description.

I know, I know--you know your kid. But in that dream, I was unable to describe Baby Namastè. It was only that, a dream, but in that moment of exigency,  could not recall his hair color or what shirt he was wearing.

Height
Weight
Age
Outfit and shoes
Hairstyle
Hair color
Eye color
Any identifying marks (scars, birthmarks, unique physical traits, etc.)

This is where that "take a clear photo before an outing" comes into play.

Be aware.

I am keenly aware of our surroundings, even when we are just doing basic errands. Random child snatchings are not the norm, but not an impossibility. I pay attention to places as well as the people in those places. I'm not paranoid, just rather observant.

Keep them close!

The rule for Kids Namastè is that they must be within arm's reach of me at all times while on an outing. The rule is simple: "If I can't reach and touch you WITH OUT stretching, you have gone too far." Even though Princess is almost 11, she is never allowed to wander off, even if just one aisle over. Time permitting, I'll go with her to look at any item she's itching to see. Baby Namastè would still be in the kangaroo pouch (I babywear, and he's still small enough that it isn't uncomfortable for either of us!), the shopping cart, or his stroller.

Speaking of carts--don't leave that thing unattended if it happens to be holding your kids! Keep one hand gripping it. Not just touching, consciously gripping. (No need to strangle the handle but definitely hold it.)

Teach your kids what to do if they find themselves separated from you.

As soon as they are able to recite cute phrases for YouTube and Snapchat, they need to also be able to recite their first name, last name, and age. Ideally they need to know mommy's and daddy's name. Even if their speech isn't 100% clear, this is beyond beneficial. Adults will often try to clarify what the child says, and even if the child can't clearly pronounce names, they can still identify when they hear them! Example: Baby Namastè cannot pronounce our last name just yet, but he recognizes it when he hears it. Ask him if he's a Kingston or a Kathmandu and he will say "no, no, no." He knows our K, though. He will nod and smile.

They need to know how to spot security officers and police.

...there.

My personal preference is to never be too outnumbered. I have but two hands, and I need at least one of those hands to do errand-y, shopping-y things. Princess Namastè is often able to grab the cart or her brother while I'm getting an item off the shelf, but I don't make her responsible for the baby. She's a huge help though!

All in all, the biggest tip I can offer is common sense: Pay attention and be prepared. No one wants to think what would happen for their child went missing, but it does happen. Children wander off and get lost, and sometimes children are carried off. Either way, the best defense we have is preparation.

Add always, I hope this helps you plan for your family's safety or perhaps enhances the plan you've got in place already.

I feel the drowsiness coming on again, so I'm going to attempt to take sleep now. I'd typically be dicing into another day by now, but it's Monday and I just don't feel up to tackling anything besides my pillow and my remaining 28 of those ever-elusive 40 winks Iwill need to make it through the morning.

Namastè!

-- Tayè K. ♡