Ahhhh humans can never be quenched!
Today I had lunch with the kiddos. We haven't been out much in recent weeks--I'm getting back to being mobile and they are settling into their new routine (school started and my home classroom is a tight ship!), so after we finished our work for today, we decided to hit up a little local wing spot.
The food in this place is the HITS! I usually order a Philly chicken and eat half, then take half home for later. The kids like to sit in there and bask in the adoration of the other frequent flyers.
It's usually really cool.
Today we went in and got our noms.
"Honey, that's a pretty baby!" Little older lady sat at the table next to ours and started cooing and playing with Tiger Lily.
"Thank you."
At this point, Princess returned to the table with Brother Bear. (They had been getting napkins and ketchup.)
"You have some beautiful children. And who is she?" Sweet lady smiled toward Princess.
"She's mine too, my first baby."
Now--there are almost ten years between Princess and Brother Bear. Less than three between Brother Bear and Tiger Lily. And of course, there is a bigger gap between Princess and Tiger Lily. Hubby and I are well aware of this gap, although people don't seem to think so.
"You mean to tell me you were almost free and then started over?!"
...yep. Someone should have warned Hubby and I before that it's against the law to have kids with a big gap. Gotta drop 'em all out immediately, regardless of your family plans. *eye roll*
Now, had it stopped there, there would be no story to tell. She moved on to greet another friend and the kids and I tucked into our food.
Except it didn't stop there. She continued chattering to her acquaintances--ABOUT ME.
And it really pissed me off. Because she was older, I didn't tear into her. YES I still have to feed Tiger Lily. YES I gave up certain freedoms. YES I am aware how much they cost and what causes them. *facepalm*
Things I wish I had been un-flabbergasted enough to tell her?
1. YES I am aware that I was "almost free."
I'm also aware that YOU are free--to keep your conjectures and your lips off my family dynamic.
2. YES I had my reasons.
In my case, it was wanting to have a stable home for them versus raising them alone. I wanted to get married, THEN give Princess a sibling or two. Maybe three someday. *shrugs*
3. NO I don't have a built-in babysitter.
Princess is just as much a child as her siblings. She is older, but she is not their mom nor is she responsible for their care. Does she play with them and keep them occupied sometimes? Absolutely yes. Does she have to? Absolutely NO. She is sweet with them and they are all definitely bonded despite the age gap, but she isn't a built-in caregiver, only their built-in friend.
4. NO I am NOT missing out on anything.
In four years my family has been on vacation maybe 20 times. WITH the small kids in tow, or me being pregnant, whichever the situation was. Was it easy? Nah. Was it as inexpensive as traveling kid-free might be? (I don't know, we have never traveled kid-free because it hasn't been our desire to leave them yet.) Our kind of travel is never inexpensive so we just bite the bullet and go where we want. As far as a social standpoint, my kids aren't the reason I don't have a more packed dance card.
People really need to spend less time worrying about how many kids others have or how they are spaced, and more time filling in their eyebrows properly. That lady analyzed my entire life in those fifteen of minutes but one eyebrow was arched and one was humped.
Sweep around your own brow line first, lady...
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