Namastè!
I hope you're experiencing copious amounts of peace and SLEEP this early morning.
I'm not. Peace, yes. Sleep?
Well, no.
Baby Namastè's in the throes of a sleep regression. My little darling, who has been a champion sleeper since practically day one, is going through a relentless wake cycle that has him up at least twice a night.
At its very technical root, a sleep regression is simply when a baby falls back into nighttime wakefulness similar to newborns and younger infants. They typically occur around times of major critical developments, times when baby's brain is firing off new connections at a breakneck pace and baby is hell bent on mastering a new set of skills.
Baby Namastè is ten months old. Very technically, 45 weeks old. He is hell bent on learning new skills at the moment--walking, talking, and sorting out sequences like bringing the spoon to his mouth or putting the blocks in the shot on his train to make it talk. He is quite in the thick of pre-toddlerhood, and for the most part it is adorable.
He currently wakes at 11 pee-em for a fresh nappy. Normal, as I don't mind a quick change (or not so quick change), and he's back off to sleep. Easy-peasy, low-cost boss sauce. But oh, 3 aye-em...why so cruel?! The 3 aye-em waking is baffling. (Or would be, if I didn't already know about sleep regressions and when they occur.)
Picture it. My son wakes up. He isn't wet, he isn't hungry, he isn't cold or hot. He isn't upset. He's just AWAKE. And he does not cry immediately. He sings. Baby syllables, strung together in a cacophony of pure infant energy. Then he whines--those low, almost guttural groans of a baby who doesn't even understand why he is awake at this hour.
I am a mommy who can't do the whine. I don't like cheese and I don't care much for 3 aye-em social hour, either. So naturally this meeting initially drove me batty.
My first instincts were to always go to the crib and see if he was wet or needed a nursing sesh. (Even during his strikes, he's willing to nurse at night--during his longest strike of two weeks, it was only at night that he'd nurse.) He would always have a bit, but I could tell he wasn't necessarily hungry. I'm actually ok with comfort nursing, but I wanted him to sleep. I wanted me to sleep!
I tried everything to "beat" this new thing. He got his warm bath and story each night. I made sure to get a good nursing sesh in right before bed (and also to clean his gums) so he would be topped off. Breastmilk digests more efficiently, and a lot faster, than formula or cow's milk, so nurslings often eat more frequently. I kept the room comfortable and got a little glow light.
We literally splashed put hundreds on sound soothers and gadgets. My son currently drools on a crib sheet that cost more than the linens on my bed. We did not know why he was having a hard to of sleeping, so we sought to make him as comfy as humanly possible.
I do not have a magic cure for a sleep regression, dears. What worked for my baby was simply getting his snee (nap) time in order, giving him plenty of time to practice his new skills during the day, and just continuing to care for his sweet little self as we had before--treating him like a person, and trying to accommodate and understand what he might be feeling. Most importantly, I had to be patient. I had to step outside my own tiredness. At times that meant letting Hubby Namastè tend to the baby, because sometimes he responds better to his dad's soothe-bounce than my soothe-rock. He did get back on the right sleep track. Within two weeks or so, my little Bud was happily snoozing away during his designated snee hours.
But oh, me?
Sleep regressions for me have been worse than teething. Worse than that wail during vaccinations. (He never cries long, but that wail of betrayal when the needle pricks his skin gives me nightmares.) Worse than knowing my baby is growing up so quickly.
I'm a mess. I'm tired. I'm slightly incoherent at times. I am a business woman so I have to be sharp, but the exhaustion creeping in makes me quite dull. I'm irritable. While the baby can catch his sleep whenever, I cannot.
Honestly, I feel like I should be well versed by now, yet each time we face a regression or wakefulness where there should be slumber, I find myself feeling like such a novice. It does balance out though. While the regressions shake me a bit, I always feel rejuvenated upon waking up that first morning after he's slept normally again. I know he does too.
What's the truth about sleep regressions? That big secret I alluded to?
They happen! They are exhausting for both babies and parents. They are frustrating because it seems that the easiest thing in the world to do, is sleep.
Remember: Babies are learning to be people, and they need our patience. That means they learn when to sleep, when to be awake, and a host of other everyday minutiae we parents scarcely give thought to until we are teaching it to our little ones.
If you've been to college (or even high school), you can relate to studying for a big important exam. You gathered up so much information, you probably thought your head would explode. After studying so diligently, you couldn't quite turn your brain off. The periodic table leapt into your sleepless thoughts, rendering you wide awake. The Pythagorean Theorem taunted you as you lay there, trying so desperately to catch the elusive Zs.
Babies are like that.
Once I realized that, I understood a bit better. I was able to handle those moments better.
...and I felt like a better mommy.
I hope this helps.
Namastè!
-- Tayè K. ♡
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