Tuesday, April 18, 2017

Ten Things You'll Want To Know About EP'ing

Namastè!

I hope you're experiencing copious amounts of peace and love this morning.

Breastfeeding is perhaps the most natural, most discussed, and (almost certainly one of) the most hot-button topics new moms have to decide about.

Most of the time, the choice is clear--either breastfeed or formula feed.

There's a little gray area though.

They breastfeed, but they don't latch. Instead of a baby, a machine removes their milk. Where mainstream breastfeeders are limited only to where they are comfortable feeding their little ones, this set of milky moms must have an outlet, a chair, and a well-stocked pump bag.

They are the exclusive pumper moms.

I am only a part of this little society when my son has a strike. However, during my forays into their world, I've learned ten things. Ten things no one told me, because I didn't know to ask. I'll share them with you, and I hope it helps your journey because while breastfeeding is natural, no one ever said it was easy.

Note: I'm NOT an IBCLC. I'm not an MD. I'm a mom who's nursed and pumped for 14 months. I'm sharing what I've learned so far, not through Google but through my LC and my actual experience. Do your due diligence!

1. You will need a good pump.

Ideally a hospital-quality pump. If, like me, you can't quite splash out a couple thousand bucks on a whim, and renting one doesn't appeal, go for the Spectra S2 (which I reviewed in glowing detail here!) OR the Spectra S1, which is essentially an S2 with rechargeable battery. If you're an extra techy mom, the Medela Sonata (reviewed here!) might appeal to you.

2. You will spend a lot of time with that pump.

I'd suggest naming it. Literally! You won't feel bonded to it, but you need to connect. You will be tethered to it for a couple hours each day. I named both my pumps and invested in cute bags for them. It makes the process a little more personal, a little less...mechanical.

3. Get some good old Parachute.

Parachute is organic, cold-pressed, food-grade coconut oil from India. (Sold on Amazon, but if you're very lucky you can find it in right your local Indo-Pak or Asian grocer.)

Why?

That flange is nothing like a baby. Friction causes blisters. Blistered nipples are painful. Painful nipples means less pumping--which leads to reduced supply.

Just get the Parachute. Or your choice of nipple cream. Lubrication can make the difference between a smooth journey and a very rough time, no pun intended.

4. Get into a routine...but don't focus on the clock.

Scheduled feedings are not always the best. With pumping, you need consistency, but not necessarily a set time. While nursing is absolutely 100% supply and demand, if you schedule your pumps too rigidly, you may miss out on key prolactin spikes. (We naturally produce more milk in the wee hours, when prolactin levels are highest.) Also, scheduling too rigidly means  you may be pumping focused on time rather than actually emptying your b'reservoirs. Example: Pam pumps every afternoon  at 2 pee em, for exactly ten minutes. If Pam could give that session just a little bit of leeway, she could elicit another letdown and get a bit more milk! Pumping isn't a watch-the-clock kinda party. Speaking of clock...

5. Don't watch the clock!

Clock-watching is the enemy of production. Pumping isn't necessarily comfortable, and it can induce a little stress. Moms often worry about their supply, how much milk they will get this session, or if their session will be interrupted by someone walking in on them. The last thing the need is another thing to worry about--the clock. While it is advisable to not overdo it (yes, you can overpump), you still need to give enough time to empty. Rather than watch the time tick by, I recommend setting a timer and doing something else to take your mind off the passage of time. When the timer goes off, check your flow. If milk flow has stopped, you are good to untether. If not, stay tethered! Besides, those 20 or 30 minutes fly by when you aren't watching every second.

6. You may not like it.

As well as I do with it, I still hate pumping.

There. I said it.

I own the best pump available (Spectra!) AND the runner-up (Sonata!)...and I still hate it. I don't like being tethered and I don't like feeling like I'm being milked!!! *stamps foot*

But...keep this in mind. While we don't necessarily like pumping, we do like giving our babies that liquid gold. Personally I beam with joy when I see my stash, or I give those bags to my recipient. (I'm a milk donor, almost 50K ounces strong!)

7. You'll quit. Or at least, strongly want to.

I have gone as far as packing my pumps up, with finality. I was so done with flanges and tubing, and Parachute and power sources. I just didn't want to do it anymore. If Baby Namastè didn't want it from the tap, he'd just have to make do with his stash and I'd pray it would last til he found a few solid foods that he would rather eat than toss off the high chair. I was tired and I wanted so much to be free of those flanges.

But I knew I wanted, even more than freedom from the flanges, for him to reap every single benefit of that liquid gold. I wanted him to be as strong and healthy and immunologically sound as possible! I wanted to get to that 2-year mark. (Initially it was the 1-year mark!) I wanted to keep going.

Take it, not day by day, but session by session.

8. You'll measure your success by the bottles and bags instead of what really counts.

We all do it, even subconsciously. We are a society of excess, so much so that what is sufficient often appears lacking. We think our breastfeeding journeys should be punctuated with bags and bottles galore, and fat cherubic babies with delicious rolls of healthy baby fat.

Wrong.

Some of us won't produce a huge stash--but our babies will thrive. Some of us simply won't see those delicious chunks--but our little babies will be just as healthy. I never got a baby full of rolls and chunkiness, but I did get a healthy little guy who is every bit as cuddly as the chunky baby I imagined--except he is real, tangible, and mine to adore.

Don't fall into the trap of worrying about "needing more milk." DON'T.

9. At some point, you'll be shamed or questioned about why you didn't do it the old-fashioned way.

I got this myself a few times. Why would I use a machine when my baby can latch and get that milk?

The same reason a person would be ballsy enough to question such a personal matter. Bold new world, eh?

It's nobody's business why you're doing this. Just plug up your pump, strap on your horns, and tune out all that extra noise. You're rocking this out, and you're doing great.

10. Someone will tell you, you aren't really breastfeeding.

I'm not sure what you're doing then. I know when I pump, it's the same milk as when my baby latches. People are so funny!

Basically, you're gonna need some serious discipline and resolve to have a good EP (exclusive pumping) journey. Also prepare to develop a thick skin, because people like to make assumptions and offer unsolicited advice, especially where babies and child rearing are concerned.

You've got this.

Namastè!

-- Tayè K. ♡

Tuesday, April 11, 2017

My Toddler Eats Like A Small Adult.

Namastè!

Happy Tuesday, all.

I'm here making dinner. Yesterday we had salmon with lime and sweet peppers, sautéed shrimp, steamed veggies, and basmati rice. (Baked potato for me.) One of my mom pals heard the menu and asked something I hear quite often lately...

"What are you making for the baby?"

"Same," I replied, glancing at the broccoli cuts steaming on the range.

"He's gonna eat that?!" Incredulous.

"He eats whatever we eat. Usually a spoonful of this or that, then when he's thirsty he gets milkies."

Wait, what?

My son is now 13 months old. He still gets milkies. He's had a rough go of solids, tho. We didn't start offering them until he was almost 9 months old, and he steadfastly preferred his milkies.

He eats Indian, Jamaican, and Chinese food often, and occasionally he'll nibble at a cheeseburger or nuggets. He's very fond of veggies--his favorites are carrots, potatoes, peas (English first, but he also likes blackeyed peas), and corn.

Prior to his birthday, we didn't press the issue.

My friend was paying rapt attention at this point, as she has a tot who eschews all foods except tater tots,  macaroni, and bananas. She fortifies her with toddler nutrition drinks, and mealtimes get a little testy sometimes. (Don't even think it. The tot is well fed, well nourished, and meeting her milestones in her own perfect time. I know my tribe is awesome, but I also know some mommies be sancti.)

As we were talking, I clued her in on how we did it.

Don't press!

We have never pressed him to eat solids. We figured in due time he would be sitting at the table eating curries, stir fry, and soufflé like the rest of our family. While some people have literally asked me if I wasn't being a bit lazy by nursing or giving expressed milkies "at his age," most have understood to simply not bother him with tastes of their food or me with questions about why he isn't eating.

When we make too big a deal of something, it opens the door for anxiety. Having dealt with the big kid food intro scenario before, I knew it was best to just play it cool. If I had something and he showed interest, I'd let him have a bite. If he wanted more, cool. If he didn't like it, no pressure.

Avoid gimmicks.

We skipped most of the cute little kids' foods. You know, cartoon characters and TV show endorsements. While those things are fun, I didn't want him to gravitate toward processed food because one, NO. Two, I try to avoid any kind of gimmicks because those items won't be available forever. Example: When Princess Namastè was a tot, she adored Mickey Pizza.

The little frozen pizzas were her favorite lunch treat, and I'd serve it with fruit or veggies for a quick fix. She loved it, so I loved it. I'd always keep one in the freezer, so she'd have it if whatever I made for dinner wasn't appealing.

Make one meal, mama.

My first big mistake was the fact that I practically always made two meals. One for me, the mommy food, and one for her. She wasn't into trying new food, and she had no incentive. If she didn't want the broccoli, no problem--she had mashed potatoes.

With Baby Namastè, I no longer do that. If he isn't allergic to the meal, there is no alternate. He's expected to eat what we eat. Usually he does. We don't make a huge fuss over anything food related, so he doesn't either.

Don't make a fuss!

Food is simpmy nourishment. We don't reward clean plates or punish unfinished meals. Desserts aren't prizes. Treats are not contingent upon anything but hunger and availability (within reason).

If my kids eat every bite of their dinners and want a little more, we offer another smaller serving of food. If they don't or won't finish, we just take the plates up and allow them to be excused. There is never any shaming or reproach. Dessert isn't an event. Ice cream, cookies, and candy are treats, not staples or rewards, and we don't make a big production of eating them.

We definitely lean toward healthier options--mostly organic, natural, locally sourced (when possible) foods. We don't shun processed goodies, but they're not regular fare.

Vary it up!

As I've probably said ad nauseam, Family Namastè's culture spans from India to Jamaica, with southern American influences. We enjoy Chinese, Italian, and Mexican food as well. As such, we have always encouraged the kids to try different foods from a myriad of cultures and provided them opportunities to do so.

While we all like pasta night, we mix it up with Indian night. Then we have something Mexican or even southern staples, soul food. Because the kids are exposed so early to so many different flavors and textures, they never really have to transition from bland baby food to standard table fare.

NOTE: I'm NOT anti-jarred food, but it doesn't work out with every kid. Lainey's Mommy gave me some priceless guidance when I was starting out with Baby Namastè and pureès. He just shows a helluva lot more interest and intent with regular food. Do what works for you.

Getting back at it...

Because of our culture and parenting philosophy, we just feed him what we eat. It's much easier. He has already developed some favorites! Example: today we had curry chicken, basmati rice, and sweet green peas. He has a Mickey Mouse plate, shaped like a Mickey head. Peas in the ears, curry and rice in the head, and empty within 20 minutes because Baby Namastè LOVES his curries and masalas.

Keep trying.

Just like adults, babies sometimes have to acclimate themselves to new flavors and textures. They may take to something instantly, or it may take a few tries. They may never like that food, and that's fine. Imagine going from a sweet liquid drink that filled your tummy and made you all cozy, to lumpy/crunch/mushy/savory/bitter/sour BUT interesting things that sometimes catch you off guard.

Be gentle on your heart and theirs. It's all a journey, and we all take different paths.

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Namastè!

Tayè K. ♡